Its a new year, 2009. So far I've managed to compare many events in my life on a timeline in my head and realize that I'm getting older. A decade ago I was in the seventh grade and had recently moved to a new town, I was the "new" girl for the first of what would turn out to be MANY times in my life. If you had asked me back in seventh grade where I thought I'd be in 10 years, its unlikely the answer would resemble much of what has become reality for me.
For one, I'd have said I'd be a college graduate. That didn't happen.
However, I would probably also have said that I would be rid of my parents, which basically did happen. And I would have assumed that I would be in a stable, mostly-happy, serious relationship (even then, I knew I was destined to become a nester) and I would have turned out to be right about that as well. The rest.... well the rest I wouldn't have seen coming.
At 12-going-on-25 I would have laughed at the idea of joining the military. At that age I was already disgusted with bureaucracy and the thought of having to live with billions of rules would have been enough to make me ill. I also thought I'd live in Illinois forever, eventually migrating to Chicago where I'd undoubtedly be very chic and well-paid. And as for what to be once I'd "grown up"? Why, an artist of course. Or maybe a musician. And I'd make boatloads of money doing it.
Then reality punched me in the face.
First it was the unexpected move to Pennsylvania, a mere 10-hour drive from everything I knew, right smack in the middle of high school of ALL horrible times. Then came the harsh reality that artists don't make money until after they've died and that although I was a decent saxophone player, I most definitely did not have what it took to be anyone that anybody would care about. The worst part? My family couldn't afford to put me through the kinds of colleges that my better-than-most grades were getting me into, but they also made too much money for me to really get any financial aid. And since I wasn't planning on going to school for hydroponic agricultural business writing, I was a mediocre athlete, and I had wasted so much time on extracurriculars to get into those stupid schools in the FIRST place that I hadn't done a lick of community service, scholarships were out of my reach.
What was a free-thinking, liberal-minded, hippie-esque girl to do? Why, join the armed forces, of course! Sadly, I was just desperate enough to go to college and get away from my psychotic father that I was pretty much okay with ignoring everything I believed in to sell my soul to Uncle Sam in return for some money for school.
Fast-forward ten years. I'm 22-going-on-45. I have a job that has nothing in the slightest to do with art or music. And I don't live in Chicago, or any even remotely-large city.
With 2009 comes our shitty economy. Its been going on for most of the past year and up until this week I was anxious about it, but I couldn't figure out why. I mean, I don't have a job in finance or auto-making, I don't have have a risky stock portfolio, and I didn't buy a house that I couldn't afford with a loan that I would never even be able to hope to pay off. So why be worried? Even gas prices plummeted in December, which was nice for my budget. But here it is: on Monday the bigwigs at work put out an email to the company. Starting Feb 1 we will being going into a pay-and-hiring freeze. If that doesn't put the company in a better place financially, the next step will be to reduce wages by up to 25%. Thats TWENTY-FIVE percent. That kind of cut would put me in the red. After that, they'll stop matching our 401k, which I could care less about, since I'll be canceling my contribution once my paycheck all but disappears. I realize that the company has been through this before, after 9/11, and that everything turned out just fine. But I have serious concerns that this recession is a much bigger monster than the one eight years ago. I keep thinking about other companies that just closed the doors, without warning to their employees. Anything could happen and the economic situation officially scares the shit out of me.
On a lighter note, I will be designing and baking my very first commissioned cake this week. It will be for our friend's 30th birthday party and it will be my official debut into the world of pastry art. I'm excited and nervous that it won't turn out, but the nice thing is that either way the recipient is extremely easy to please.
Also, it sounds like I'll be going back to second shift
1 comment:
The cake was the shiznit! thanks -M
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